Do you suffer from a harsh inner critic? Do you listen to it when it warns you to stay in your comfort zone? Are you constantly judging yourself, people pleasing, avoiding conflict, trying to control everything, being a perfectionist, and feeling anxious? 

All of us experience negative, self-sabotaging inner thoughts, referred to as our inner critic, or our saboteurs. Saboteurs hold you back from greater confidence, success and happiness.

👩🏽‍⚖️ The judge is the universal, master saboteur that we all have. The judge judges yourself, others and circumstances as good or bad.

How else does your brain sabotage you? There are nine accomplice saboteurs that you have within you to varying degrees: the stickler, the pleaser, the victim, the restless, the avoider, the controller, the hyper-achiever, the hyper-vigilant and the hyper-rational 👿

Which saboteur is the strongest in you? Take this free 2-minute assessment to find out: https://www.positiveintelligence.com/assessments/

I have a strong avoider saboteur, which focuses on positive tasks in an extreme way – this means I have the tendency to avoid difficult conversations, which hurts my relationships. I spent most of my life letting my saboteurs completely derail my success and happiness 😢

What if you could learn to tame these sabotaging thoughts in favor of positive self-talk? Reducing your negative self-talk is key 🗝️ to confidence building.

Check out how I learned to weaken my saboteurs and get more success and happiness from life:

🪞 Simply notice these saboteur voices when they show up. What do they say do you? When do they show up the most?

👺 Give your judge a persona or name. I think of my judge as a dominatrix sitting on my shoulder whipping me. Saying things like “you sound stupid” or “you will fail”. How can you personify your judge?

🧾 Use evidence to counter the judge. When your judge criticizes you, ask yourself: “what’s some evidence against these words?” For example, one of my clients felt “like an idiot” while working on a major acquisition for her company. To counter this self-judgment, she told herself that no one understands the intricacies of this deal like she does.

🧘🏽 Do Positive Intelligence (or PQ) reps. PQ reps are 10 seconds of focusing on physical sensations in the present moment – like 10 second bursts of meditation. For example, taking deep breaths or rubbing two fingertips together. By using any of your senses, you can tap into your body to get out of your negative thoughts

❤️ Treat yourself with compassion. Be kind and understanding to yourself even when you mess up. Recognize that suffering and feelings of inadequacy are part of being human. Instead of speaking harshly to yourself, practice saying loving and kind things to yourself – like you would talk to a loved one.  

Do you need more support?

Sign up for my Summer Confidence Bootcamp for women in tech before it sells out 🚨

Over six weeks, you’ll learn how to go from insecure to unstoppable by completely changing the way you talk to yourself.

What you’ll get:

✅ 6 weekly live group coaching sessions Monday nights from 5pm to 6pm PST starting July 22

✅ Recorded videos: never miss a session, even if your schedule is packed.

✅ Annual access to the Positive Intelligence app ($1,000 USD value).

✅ Supportive community of women in tech.

✅ Exclusive WhatsApp group.

🔥 Hot summer pricing: regular price $997, now only $597 USD – act now before this price goes up.

After going through the bootcamp, Tina said:

“I am much softer on myself. I feel more confident and much more grounded. I am enough. I don’t have to know everything. I am good at what I do.”

Reducing your negative self-talk is the key to confidence building. Are you ready to get started? Send me a message to sign up today: coaching@annagradie.com

Lots of love,

-Anna

Categories: